Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize