Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?

(312): View more from Illinois

It's worth it.

(248): View more from Michigan

How worth it?

(312): View more from Illinois

Back door worth it

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill

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(770): View more from Georgia

next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.

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(573): View more from Missouri

You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.

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(757): View more from Virginia

Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.

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(818): View more from California

The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!

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(512): View more from Texas

when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!

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