Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Redeem this text for a blowjob
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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