I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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