im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
