hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Randomize
