i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize