he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
