is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
