He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
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