I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Can I color on your dick again?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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