chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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