they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
