Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
The uberlube is also flammable
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
