glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
