this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize