I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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