I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
