omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I currently don't understand fingers.
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