So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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