We won't sleep together?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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