id be glad to
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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