Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
