Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
