What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
