is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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