Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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