when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
