next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
