turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Watching her eat just hurts me
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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