You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
