Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
