I want to walk on stilts...naked
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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