I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
