chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
