yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
