So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
