Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
