Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize