Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize