We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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