I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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