the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
If I had your ass I would rule the world
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
