): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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