nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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