Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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