i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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