Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
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