they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
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