What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
