Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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