she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
it's like iHOP with fire
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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